Halloween is not a holiday.
I know I’m going to ruffle some feathers today. But ultimately, this post IS NOT about whether or not you should celebrate Halloween. That’s not my point.
But if you want to get to the good point, you’ll have to hear me out about Halloween….
We don’t celebrate Halloween at our house. We haven’t for years. My kids don’t dress up. They don’t go trick or treating. We don’t have parties or decorations.
We DO have a family fun night on the 31st though (so don't worry, my kids are not deprived).
It’s not because I stand on some morally high ground and oppose the “holiday” (Even though I don’t understand why you want to celebrate ghosts, scary monsters and skeletons. I bet you’ve never seen a dead body with its skeleton coming out. If you did, I bet you wouldn’t want to use it as decoration….just saying…)
No, the reason we don’t celebrate Halloween is because I hated the end result of the evening.
When my kids where younger they screamed and cried getting into and being in their costumes (the kitty and princess didn’t look so cute then…). Plus, we live in Minnesota. Do you know our weather on October 31st? Usually cold. Sometimes even snow. So, trick or treating means coats, boots, hats, mittens. So, I asked myself, “Why am I paying all this money for something nobody will see and my kids will only wear once?”
Oh, and don’t get me started on candy. Yes, I’m a health coach, but I had objections about massive amounts of sugar being flooded into a 5-year-old body long before coaching. Small doses are fine but on Halloween, there is no such thing as small doses of candy.
Lastly, I hate being scared. I don’t think it’s funny and I don’t like it. I took my two oldest trick or treating ONE year when they were preschool/toddler age. It was AWFUL. Two of the houses (which I didn’t know at the time) enjoy scaring little kids when they came up to trick or treat. Needless to say, my daughters were bawling.
So, I gave up 5 years ago. I dreaded the actual day, all days leading up it and a few days after the massive sugar crash. I decided to quit Halloween.
Because I realized I wasn’t celebrating Halloween for my kids’ enjoyment or even my own. I was participating because I thought I SHOULD.
That’s when I decided…
How does this relate to you?
Well, let me ask you about your last diet? Did you do it because everyone at work was doing it? Did you start because you’re worried about what your husband said about the way you look? Or maybe you joined the bandwagon of keto because your friend says it’s the best thing ever.
Or how about exercising? Do you hate the gym but have a membership because a group of your friends likes a particular class? Or maybe you try to stick to a running routine because your sister-in-law runs marathons and thought you should have that goal too.
Let me guess. It’s not working very well for you. You’re probably inconsistent at best. I would even venture to say you are frustrated with yourself.
You feel like you “should”.
I’m here to tell you friend, you SHOULDN’T.
Every time you tell yourself you should, follow it up with the with the question, "Who says I should?"
My ears perk up every time I hear the word should. It is a nasty word we use against ourselves. It implies that we want a certain result, but we hate the actions to get to the result.
Take for example Halloween for me. I wanted the result of a fun night for my kids and to make wonderful memories. I thought I SHOULD celebrate Halloween to get those results. But the truth was, I wasn’t creating those results and I was hating what I had to do to get it. In the end, the opposite of what I wanted was created.
So, instead of trying to enjoy Halloween, I got clear on what me and my family really needed from this time. We created that result but with totally different actions and loved the process of getting there.
You want to create the result of losing weight? Stop telling yourself you SHOULD eat a particular way or you SHOULD exercise using a certain method. Instead, ask yourself, “What do I want to eat that will make me feel good LONG TERM?” How can I fit this into my life? What can I cut out that doesn’t fuel my body? How can I move my body and enjoy it?”
If you’re saying to yourself, “There are no answers to those questions!” I want to call you out. There are answers. I’ve found them for my life and my clients have found answers for their lives also.
Losing weight doesn’t have to be miserable. It actually SHOULDN’T be. If it’s punishing, hard, frustrating or depriving, any weight you lose won’t last.
Drop the should.
It’s not getting you there any faster.
Are you confused about how to lose weight with out the "shoulds"? Do you struggling with relying on will power to do things you think you need to do? Wondering if there is a better way? I hear you. I was in the same boat 3 years ago. Sign up for a FREE 45 minute consult and lets talk about your options to get you moving forward and not stay stuck in the "should".