The Plan to DEFEAT Self Sabotage
Last week, I hope you took away a few things from the blog post.
- We all self-sabotage in some area of our life.
- We can choose not self-sabotage, and align with God’s truths to fight the enemy’s attacks.
I want to give you some step by step instructions on how I stop the downhill slide of self-destruction.
To do this, I’m going to talk about how I followed through on the goal to write one blog post a week for a whole year. How I managed not to self-sabotage and quit.
I hate writing. I’ve never thought of myself as a good writer. Since I don’t think of myself as a good writer, I gave up trying to get better. I find no fun in it and it is a struggle to get me to write ANYTHING.
Here in lies the first key to stopping self-sabotage; knowing your opinions about yourself and the activity.
STOP telling yourself you're not good at "it". STOP finding all reasons you don't like "it".
It's not helping.
I see this all the time with my weight loss clients. They will tell me things like,
- “I don’t like working out.”
- “I don’t like vegetables.”
- “I’m not good at cooking, especially healthy food.”
- “I can’t motivate myself to get up and move.”
So many of my clients say these things like they are just facts. Just like I would say to people, “I’m not a good writer.” None of these are facts. They are just opinions. Opinions are just thoughts about yourself. Thoughts you CAN change.
If you answer the question, “Who says?”, with the answer “I do.”, then you know it’s just your thoughts!
Step #1: BRING AWARENESS to all the opinions (thoughts) you have about the activities that will get you to your goal.
Are they mostly positive or mostly negative? Are they helping you take action or hindering you? GET REALLY CLEAR what God says about the situation.
I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. Philippians 4:13
This is a really good universal verse when it comes to ANY opinion you may have about yourself that is holding you back.
I had a lot of obstacles along the way when pursuing this for a whole year! I had to figure out how to set up a website and publish a blog, what format worked best, how long to make them, what elements I needed, and what caught people's attention (still working on all of these by the way...). Not only that, but I had to figure out how much time I it took me to write and plan accordingly.
And so on and so forth.
Every obstacle was a potential reason for me to quit.
That’s Step #2: Get clear on all your obstacles. You may not be aware of them ahead of time, but you will find them once you start. Then, WRITE THEM DOWN. Keep a log of them ALL.
Next, for each one, write down a solution (because there is always a solution). Write down the ones you've tried and failed at, the ones you want to try and the ones you are trying now.
You will want to skip this. DON’T! Seeing the obstacles on paper is much more powerful than having this running list in your head. It is also helpful in you seeing how many different solutions are available to you.
“Ask and it will be given to you, seek and you will find; knock and it will be opened to you.” Matthew 7:7
What does this look like on a weight loss journey? Well, if you’re trying to lose weight and you keep coming to the obstacle of eating before supper, you can’t just ignore it. Beating yourself up won’t help either.
You need to look at it rationally.
Why do I want to eat at this time? What can I try that will help me not eat before supper? What am I thinking or feeling around this time?
Get curious. Then ask God for the solution you should take and try it out. Even if that solution doesn’t work, there is always another one... and another one.... and another one.
Learn and keep moving forward.
Which leads me to the next step:
Step #3: KEEP RE-COMMITTING! Know WHY you are trying to accomplish your goal and write them down. Write a letter to yourself when you start so you know how you felt and how excited you were.
Pull these out when you feel stuck, when you’re ready to give up.
For me, this was essential. When I wanted to start a blog, I decided it really has nothing to do with whether or not I’m a good writer. It had everything to do with getting what I knew was essential out into the world and discussed more. I knew God was calling me to encourage through this opportunity.
My “why”s kept me re-committing every time I read them.
Same goes with you. Why do you want to lose weight? Don’t stop at the first answer. Keep asking yourself why. (Hint: You know you’ve come upon a motivating reason when it comes down to a relationship {why yourself, your spouse, kids, friends, etc.}. Because… God made us for relationships.)
“Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him and he will do this;” Psalm 37:5
“Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.” Galatians 6:9
Step #4: Remember that how you measure progress may not be how GOD measures progress.
Stick with God's measure, it's the best.
So many of my clients are ready to quit when the scale doesn’t move. What they don’t understand, is the process is working, just not by the measures THEY have set. Patience and trust is required.
Remember you're plan may not be aligned with God's yet.
How did this look for me? When I first started, nobody was reading my blog (actually, I’m pretty sure there will only be a few of you that read this one). But, little by little, people would approach me or message me about something I wrote about. That’s when I knew, I may not be able to physically see the progress, but GOD is working. I just need to trust HIM and his plan.
"'For I know the plans I have for you', declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.'" Jeremiah 29:11
Step #5, the last step: Pray. Pray some more.
Ask God to align your thinking with His.
Ask God for His strength.
Ask God to guide you when you feel the “self-destruct mode” has been initiated.
Because He's got you.
He is always working for your good.
“And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.” Romans 8:28
Just in knowing and BELIEVING in that, we can let go of the self-sabotage and let God work!
Do you want some help implementing and FOLLOWING through on your goal to lose weight? Do you want this to be the LAST time? That's what I'm an expert at. Sign up for a FREE consultation HERE, to find out more.
