Desperate to Lose Weight: Use Fear, Don't Avoid It

amanda kaldor coaching Sep 23, 2022

Top 20 Ways to Lose Weight and Keep it Off

You aren’t new to the weight loss struggle. 

You’ve tried countless diets and exercise routines. You’ve even been successful at shedding some pounds. 

… but those long-lost pounds seem to keep finding their way back to you and you are just plain tired of this seemingly endless battle. 

Friend, you can lose weight and keep it off by learning the top 20 things that no one tells you about how to truly be successful on your journey. 

This is part 8 of a 20-part blog series that will give you a strong foundation of strategy you need to lose weight, keep it off, and start living the life you were born to live! 

Some of what I share will be opposite of what all the diet gurus tell you, so read on with an open and prayerful mind and let God work on you from the inside out of your health and fitness journey! 

Part 8: Use Fear … Don’t Avoid it 



A word that brings about all types of frightening thoughts. 


Fear of heights. Fear of creepy, crawly creatures. Fear of flying. Fear of the dark. 


There are more fears than we can spend time listing here today. The fear I want you to tap into on your weight loss journey is the fear of facing and feeling emotion. Stay with me as we unpack this rather uncomfortable topic. 


I’d like to start with sharing a raw, personal story about my own journey with fear … in hopes my story will help you. 


About six years ago I was serving as a RN. If you know anything at all about the medical field, you probably know the days are long, the expectations are high, and the stress can be overwhelming. Most days as an RN I would clock in and immediately get swept into the mounting tasks of the day. Some days I wouldn’t get a chance to stop and eat at all. Other days I’d grab a quick bite. It was truly a toss-up as to whether that bite was healthy or simply something easy to eat while on the move. 


I was exhausted at the end of each shift. But, of course, my day was just beginning because even though I’d clocked out of my day job, I still had to clock in at my 24-hour wife, mom, and home life. 


You know the drill. The cooking … the cleaning … the husband … the kids. The boxes could never be completely checked off because life never stops happening. 


I’d arrive home, semi-ready to tackle the evening to-dos, but I didn’t arrive alone. I was accompanied by exhaustion and stress. I’d head straight to the pantry, grab a handful of snacks, and dive right into rounding up the kids and getting dinner ready. In the course of my evening, every time stressful thoughts would reignite in my mind, I’d head back to the pantry for another handful of snacks. Without fail, I’d always find myself having eaten a full “dinner” before actually eating dinner. 


Now, after gorging myself with my go-to pantry snacks and dinner, my exhaustion and stress was joined by guilt and shame. This cycle had me trapped in its never-ending web … and I just couldn’t break free. 


So, what exactly was my problem? 


I was weighed down by stress because I was living in fear. 


Fear of something going wrong. 


Fear of not being good enough at my job. 


Fear of not being enough for my husband and children. 


To top these fears off, I was also afraid of allowing my family to see my fear for what it might do to them. What would my husband think? How would my children respond? After all, I was supposed to be the happy, go-lucky wife and the sweet nurturing mom. Wasn’t I? 


So, instead of allowing myself to feel these fears so I could deal with them … I simply found temporary relief … one snack at a time. 


What it all boiled down to, friend, is that I was afraid to feel and show emotion. 


Can you relate to my story? I know many of the women I coach have shared this same, exact experience with me when they come to me with trouble losing weight and keeping it off. 


Instead of recognizing fear for what it is, they found themselves in the same situation I was lost in … covering fear up with food and wondering why they just couldn’t stop eating. 


The solution to this phenomenon is outrageously simple. As crazy as it sounds, the very tool I use to walk up to my fears and battle them head on is curiosity. 


You see, fear causes you to cover your emotions with a mask. Truth be told, fear is a mask. It’s a mask from what God really wants you to pay attention to … a mask from the good gifts God is offering you at this very moment. 


What if you, in a moment of raw honesty, take a peek under your mask … under your fear? What would you see? 


The enemy’s goal is to cover up all of the good God has placed in you and all the good God wants to draw out of you. So, he uses fear to keep the woman of God you were born to be hidden away. 


The curiosity process to overcome fear is simple and easy. It starts with encouraging yourself to be intentional, asking yourself questions, and allowing yourself to be honest as you answer. 


What is this feeling I am having right now? 


What is making me feel stressed? 


Why do I feel afraid? 


What is it that is making me feel overwhelmed? 


When you are able to be curious about a problem, it is then you can begin seeking out the solution instead of using food as an avoidance mechanism. It’s in this place you will begin to unravel the root of each feeling and emotion. It is also in this place you will be able to tap into the goodness of God. 


In allowing fear to mask my emotions I wasn’t allowing myself to be aware. Aware of the real issues at hand and aware of the goodness and the love of God at play in my life. Once I became curious, I became aware, and it was then I began to allow myself to feel emotion rather than eat through emotion. 


Friend, one step in being successful on your journey to weight loss, is to overcome fear with curiosity. Walk toward your fear. Unmask your fear. Find out what is at the bottom of your fear and take it to God in prayer rather than hiding your fear at the bottom of a bag of chips. 


This process is simple, but can be uncomfortable, as you are already probably aware. I’d love to support you as you take on your fears and begin to unmask them on the way to reaching your weight loss goals. I’m a Christian Weight Loss Life Coach and I’ve partnered with dozens of women to help them reach long-term, sustainable weight loss. 


You can learn more about what this journey will look like with a free, no commitment, discovery call. Let’s work together to help you take back control of your life and overcome the weight loss struggles that have been weighing you down far too long. 


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